Dinara Denisova
Psychological climate in the family

It all starts with families.

The formation of a child, his development, the formation of personality, as is known, largely depends not only on his financial situation, but also on his moral state. psychological climate of that family where he lives. Family- the primary cell of society, one of its most important social institutions. It is here that the child prepares for life, acquires the first and deepest social ideals, it is here that a person’s character, his habits, his worldview are laid, and it is there that the foundation of his citizenship is laid. Family traditionally conveys social, cultural and moral values ​​and experience to children, instills in them hard work and spirituality. Here concepts such as fatherhood and motherhood, family relationships and traditions are learned. Our life is not always stable and calm; sometimes despair and difficulties invade it. Any trials become easier if a person is supported by people close and dear to him.

Psychological climate in the family determines stability inside family relations, has a decisive influence on the development of both children and adults. It is not something immutable, given once and for all. It is created by the members of each families and it depends on their efforts whether it will be favorable or unfavorable and how long the marriage will last.

So for the auspicious psychological climate the following are typical signs:

1. cohesion,

2. the possibility of comprehensive development of the personality of each of its members,

3. high benevolent demands of members families to each other,

4. feeling of security and emotional satisfaction, pride in belonging to one’s family,

5. responsibility.

IN family with a favorable psychological climate each of its members treats the others with love, respect and trust, their parents - also with reverence, and the weaker ones - with readiness to help at any moment. Important indicators of favorable psychological climate of the family are the desire of its members to spend their free time in home circle, talk about topics that interest everyone, do homework together, emphasize the virtues and good deeds of everyone. Such climate promotes harmony, reduces the severity of emerging conflicts, relieves stress, increases the assessment of one’s own social significance and realizes the personal potential of each member families. The initial basis of favorable family climate are marital relations. Living together requires spouses to be willing to compromise, to be able to take into account the needs of their partner, to give in to each other, and to develop such qualities as mutual respect, trust, and understanding.

When members families experience anxiety, emotional discomfort, alienation, in this case they speak of unfavorable psychological climate in the family. All this prevents the implementation family one of its main functions is psychotherapeutic, relieving stress and fatigue, and also leads to depression, quarrels, mental tension, deficit in positive emotions. If members families do not strive to change this situation for the better, then the very existence families becomes problematic.

Why is it important to talk about relationships? family:

Firstly, the development of a child from the first days of life proceeds in family, where it is already installed or is being installed psychological climate.

Secondly, every family has its own number and composition, which contributes to the versatility, consistency and duration of educational influence.

The connection between generations ensures the creation and development family traditions, an appeal to the origins of folk culture. It is in the presence of such connections that the child’s social and moral development occurs.

Thirdly, in family conditions are created for the inclusion of children in a variety of intra-family relationships and activities, and the child also receives information about himself - Self-Concept - where he makes the first decision about himself and where his social nature begins to develop.

Fourthly, interaction between parents, relationships between parents and children, patterns of behavior, activities influence preschoolers’ awareness of the rules, style of communication with other people, and then are transferred to their own behavior, and in the future are projected into family.

D. S. Makarenko, “Your own behavior is the most decisive thing. - he wrote. - Do not think that you are raising a child only when you talk to him, or teach him, or order him. You raise him at every moment of your life, even when you are not at home. How you dress, how you talk to other people and about other people, how you are happy or sad, how you communicate with friends and enemies, how you laugh, read the newspaper - all this is of great importance for a child. The child sees or feels the slightest changes in tone, all the turns of your thoughts reach him in invisible ways, you do not notice them. And if at home you are rude, or boastful, or drunk, and even worse, if you insult your mother, you are already causing great harm to your children, you are already raising them badly, and your unworthy behavior will have the most dire consequences.

Only a person who makes high demands, first of all on himself, can hope that his demands on others will be perceived as correct and fair. First you need to change your behavior, and then demand it from others.

Children learn from what surrounds them.

If a child is often criticized, he learns to condemn;

If a child is often shown hostility, he learns to fight;

If a child is often ridiculed, he learns to be timid;

If a child is often shamed, he learns to feel guilty;

If a child is often treated condescendingly, he learns to be tolerant;

If a child is often encouraged, he learns self-confidence;

If a child is often praised, he learns to evaluate;

If you are usually honest with a child, he learns justice;

If a child lives with a sense of security, he learns to believe;

If a child lives in an atmosphere of friendship and feels needed, he learns to find love in this world.

For centuries, the family has been revered as a great value, especially when a person needed a large team in order to simply survive in difficult conditions of the struggle for existence.

The family in modern society is becoming a small group.

Firstly, this is a family union, which is based on an emotional feeling - love.

Secondly, the family carries out the most important function of biological and social reproduction of the population.

Thirdly, education is carried out in the family, that is, the transfer of experience, certain foundations, and values ​​to new generations. This is all scientific thinking.

The family largely determines what the human development index will be in the future, what human capital will be like tomorrow and the day after tomorrow. Society must realize the importance of the process of spiritual and moral education in families, its significant place in instilling values ​​and love for the Motherland. The stronger, more reliable, more stable the family, the stronger our Fatherland.

For a long time in our Fatherland there was a widespread opinion that family education should be replaced by public education. Proponents of this point of view put forward the following arguments: parents, as a rule, do not have teaching abilities.

The experience of happy, friendly families clearly demonstrates: sometimes only sweet Nothing, a trifling gift, an elementary manifestation of participation in the affairs and concerns of loved ones can significantly weaken the unnaturalness of relationships, improve the situation, establish a family, if not an idyll, then at least a certain harmony, to the common good of not only the older members of the family, but, above all, the main in the same way young man(materially, spiritually, and morally).

Since ancient times people have said:

A house with children is a bazaar, without children a grave.

Children are a special joy in a family. Raising them is a pleasure. Although adults say that you don’t have time to do anything with children, they understand that they cannot live without this “bazaar”.

Like the father, like the children

Children learn from their parents' examples. Sometimes, by looking at a child, you can judge his parents.

The mother feeds her children like the earth does people.

Mom, like the earth, loves her children and tries to do everything for them so that they do not need anything.

The sweet child has many names.

Adults like to call their children different affectionate names.

Objectives of this study:

1. Analysis of social and public characteristics modern families(based on creative tasks of 8th grade students);

2. Identification family values, family traditions and their role in the modern family;

Research objectives:

1. Show the importance of family in modern society;

2. Reveal children’s views on the family and its role in their lives;

3. Focus on the importance of traditions in the family.

The relevance of research:

2008 declared by the President Russian Federation in Russia "Year of the Family".

Currently, the institution of family is experiencing a crisis, so it is very important to pay attention to the value of family for every person. The fact that young people are dissatisfied with many things in the lives of previous generations and their parents is an obvious fact, but it does not follow from it that the meaning of the activities of each new generation is to raise a rebellion against the established way of life in general and in their family in particular. In all ages, children want to act in their own way, parents want them to act in accordance with their ideas and concepts.

The most painful question, the stumbling block in any family, is the question of who should do what and when. At the same time, each family member has his own idea of ​​the fairness of the distribution of all the numerous responsibilities: small and large, daily and one-time. True justice, which does not infringe on the interests of any member of the family team, is based on the equal participation of all family members. This means that everyone should have a full say in the distribution of the household budget and in the distribution of specific household responsibilities for the day, for the week, for the month.

Psychological climate in the family

In a family like in small group Each participant in the relationship has their own roles. Moreover, the roles of family members do not always coincide with the group role. Often the role of leader in the family does not belong to the father, but to the one whose contribution to the family well-being is recognized by all family members.

First of all, the psychological climate determines the well-being of a person in the family (mood, comfort). This well-being depends on the relationships between members of the family team; it is the relationships of care, attention, and cooperation that make the family climate warm and pleasant. Against, disrespectful relationships, indifference make the climate harsh, unpleasant, difficult to live in.

The psychological climate of a family is a relatively stable emotional state. It is the result of the totality of the mood of family members, their emotional experiences. Relationships to other people, to surrounding events. A favorable climate is characterized by cohesion, benevolent demands on each other, a sense of security, pride in belonging to a family. In a family with a favorable climate, love, trust in each other, respect for elders, mutual respect, and a willingness to understand and help others reign. An important place in creating a favorable climate belongs to family life, traditions, and common spiritual values. The family, as a special group based on kinship ties, presupposes special intra-family communication, during which the family realizes its functions. Communication in a favorable family environment is characterized by naturalness, cordiality, and mutual interest.

An unfavorable family climate leads to tension, quarrels, conflicts, and a lack of positive emotions. Younger family members especially suffer in such an environment. In the most severe cases, such a climate leads to family breakdown.

8th grade students prepared creative assignments that addressed the following questions:

What is family in your understanding?

Talk about your family members, emphasize their role in the family;

Show family traditions and visualize them through media presentations.

And this is what happened. Family:

A family is one whole, where relatives take care of each other, help, and most importantly understand, respect and appreciate each other. All together this is called LOVE

Family is a group of close people who are ready to help each other at any time.

Family is the people closest to you who will support you in difficult moments of life, where mutual understanding reigns, where each other’s opinions are respected.

Family is a place where you want to come, where they understand and accept you for who you are.

Family is the place of birth and formation. The family forms and lives the entire set of relationships to man, nature, work, beauty, science, art, society, money, power, the strong, the weak.

A family is a unit of society, which is built on blood and spiritual unity, on love and harmony, on caring for each other.

Family is people who wait for you, trust you, understand you and support you in any situation.

Each of us needs a place where you don’t have to pretend, where you won’t be deceived, where you feel calm and happy, where you can rest your soul. This place for me is my family.

Family is sacred. Family is something you can’t live without.

Here's what they write about their family members:

Mom is a kind and affectionate person.

Mom is a very interesting person, she will always help you figure it out if you get confused.

Mom is cheerful, stylish, sociable, and a good housewife.

Mom is a responsive and sensitive person. She gives different advice and helps in difficult situations. And not just advice, but practical advice. After all, what kind of mother would wish bad things on her child?

My mother always supports me, although sometimes we argue with her mainly because of how words are pronounced correctly. In most cases, our disputes are resolved by our grandmother. Well, or Ozhegov. Mom will always help me deal with problems, my mother teaches me independence, love, perseverance, and not to hang my nose if something doesn’t work out. I love my mom very much!

I am learning the culture of communication from my mother.

I see how tired my mother is, working as a cashier at Maria-Ra, so part of the housework falls on me. I have to take Nastya away from kindergarten and take care of her while her mother is away. Despite all the workload, my mother can create coziness and a comfortable environment at home.

Dad is a sensitive and responsive father.

Dad is a person you can trust, who will always understand you. But in return it requires order and independence.

I learn from my father how to approach work and one’s responsibilities.

My dad is serious, he is a role model for me. He teaches me to be strong, attentive and to easily endure the difficulties encountered along the path of life.

Dad is an entrepreneur. A strong and serious person. Teaches me to be courageous and strong.

Every child needs a grandmother. After all, someone must pamper and allow everything that parents do not allow. Baba Lyuba teaches me to respect adults and appreciate what you have. I admire my grandmother, because not every grandmother works at 60, chooses a suit for work every morning (after trying on 3 more), wears her favorite perfume and with an open soul goes to college to teach children Russian, literature and, of course, life.

A polite and sympathetic grandmother who teaches how to properly communicate with others.

As my grandmother says: “the old women folded their balls, threw down their hooks and calmly rode around the village on mopeds.” And indeed, we are so accustomed to the image of a sitting old woman with a ball in her hands.

Sisters and brothers:

A cheerful and interesting girl.

Creates a relaxed atmosphere in the home.

I’m learning patience from my brother.

He considers himself a very important person in this life and behaves on an equal footing with adults. No matter what, she certainly doesn’t have the nerve. Lives by the motto: “Where would the planet be without me?”

Brother: he goes to the Bee kindergarten and he brings many joyful moments into my life.

So, sisters and brothers become little people who take and return care and warmth in the same quantity as they receive.

The child learns

What he sees in his home:

His parents are an example to him

If children see us and hear us,

We are responsible for our deeds

And for the words: easy to push

Children on a bad path.

Keep your house tidy

So as not to repent later.

(S. Brant)

Every family has values:

Parents are always polite to each other. Respect for elders is the most important value. As well as teaching the rules of behavior in society, and the development of moral qualities.

One of the traditions is to get together with the whole family on holidays, be it a birthday or New Year.

Our family is distinguished by mutual assistance, joint problem solving, relaxation, discussion of everyday events and actions, and an active lifestyle. I am happy in my family.

In my life there are two most important person, my sister and mother. Unfortunately, we don’t have a dad, so I, as the only man, have to not offend my mom and sister.

Recently I realized that caring “one way” is “working idle”. Probably, in a family everything should be shared equally, and care too: children to parents and vice versa. Just participation: saying thank you, putting away dishes without a reminder, cleaning the room, patience in conversation, kind word- that’s what’s important in the family.

In our family, the main value is communication, because we don’t see each other very often. We also value mutual understanding and freedom of choice.

Our family is creative, we like to listen to foreign, beautiful music. My dad brought this value to the family. Dad also instilled in us feelings of patriotism for the Motherland. And my mother teaches me and my brother to be independent. When I was 10 years old, I was left alone with my little brother, without fear that anything would happen. My mother can completely rely on me. Mom brings a sea of ​​positive emotions to our home.

Students in their works about family tried to show positive side family relationships, which indicates the importance of family in the eyes of the child, pride in their parents.

Conclusion

We are born to live together; our society is a vault of stones that would collapse if one did not support the other. (Seneca)

The social position of a person depends to a decisive extent on himself, but an important role is also played by the social conditions in which he has to act, the point from which a person starts, and here the family plays an important role. Socialization of a child is one of the main tasks of parents. First of all, it starts in the family. The climate in the family determines the child’s internal state, his relationships with others, his success in various activities, how he will build his future life, his view of the family. A person carries throughout his life the traditions and values ​​instilled in his family in childhood, and tries to build his family on the same principles.

We believe that not only adults can help solve the problem, but also children can make their contribution to maintaining the psychological climate in the family.

RAISING CHILDREN

A family is a complex system of relationships between spouses, parents, children, and other relatives. Taken together, these relationships constitute the microclimate of the family, which directly affects the emotional well-being of all its members, through the prism of which the rest of the world and their place in it are perceived. Depending on how adults behave with the child, what feelings and attitudes are expressed by loved ones, the child perceives the world as attractive or repulsive, benevolent or threatening. As a result, he develops trust or distrust in the world (E. Erikson).

The psychological climate of a family can be defined as a set of psychological attitudes, mood, and relationships between parents and children.The following indicators of the state of the psychological climate of the family are distinguished: the degree of emotional comfort, the level of anxiety, the degree of mutual understanding, respect, support, assistance, empathy and mutual influence; place of leisure (within or outside the family), openness of the family in relationships with its immediate environment.
D.V. Winnicott distinguishes two categories of psychological climate: favorable and unfavorable. A favorable psychological climate in a family is determined by the following features of intrafamily relationships: mutual understanding and stability, cohesion, positive emotional state, moral family values. An important influence on the psychological climate of the family is exerted by the culture of communication between spouses and with children, joint family self-care for the family, and the creation of a family subculture. The stabilization of emotional relationships depends on the equality of its members, individual needs that are satisfied by marriage and family life in general.

A favorable home environment has a positive effect on relationships with friends and classmates, and creates a sense of teamwork in the child.An unfavorable psychological climate in a family is determined when there are chronic difficulties and conflicts in one or more areas of family relationships; family members experience constant anxiety and emotional discomfort; alienation prevails in relationships. At the same time, children are characterized by conflict in other areas of communication - at school, informal associations, and subsequently in work collectives.

It should be noted that one of the factors in shaping the psychological climate of a family is character. Stability and stability of character traits gives us the opportunity to predict how a person will behave in a certain situation, his reaction to everyday difficulties, etc.

Another important factor in the psychological climate in the family is marital compatibility, which is one of the most complex phenomena in people’s family and marital relations. The degree of this compatibility determines not only its psychological climate, but also the stability of the family, its social effectiveness in terms of performing the most important function - reproductive and educational, as well as psychotherapeutic.

The peculiarity of parent-child relationships in the family is that they are of particular emotional significance for both the child and the parents, and therefore form a certain psychological climate in the family. The most important manifestations parental attitude are tenderness, care, sensitivity to the needs of the child, reliability, security, predictability, consistency. These relationships involve two opposing trends. One of them is the desire for knowledge, risk, exciting situations, and the other is the desire for protection and security. One tendency encourages the child to separate from his parents and strive for external world, while the other returns it back. The parent's ability to properly encourage these tendencies determines the usefulness of the parental relationship for the child's development.

There are a variety of types of psychological climate in the family, each of which characterizes intrafamily relationships, the components of which are parent-child relationships, reflecting the content of family values ​​and, consequently, the educational potential of the family.

V.M. Sokolov identifies the following types of psychological climate in the family:

1) a stable negative psychological climate of the family is the opposite of a positive climate. Typically, this type of psychological climate indicates problems within the family. A negative climate is characterized by a lack of family devotion on the part of the spouses, a low degree of mutual support, and insufficient concern for the welfare of each of its members. With a negative psychological climate of the family, one can observe a negative attitude between spouses, including towards children, irritability, suspicion; in such a family, minor quarrels constantly break out, which often grow into large, protracted conflicts;

2) the unstable, variable psychological climate in the family is manifested in the insufficiently friendly attitude of the spouses towards each other. Often the attributes of a variable psychological climate include minor quarrels, inattentive attitude towards each other, “formal” or “duty” smiles, jokes and even laughter.

3) an uncertain psychological climate, manifests itself in families where spouses, partially disappointed in living together, experience some tension. This prevents the family from fulfilling one of its main functions - psychotherapeutic, relieving stress and fatigue, and also leads to depression, quarrels, mental tension, and a lack of positiveemotions . If family members do not strive to change this situation for the better, then the very existence of the family becomes problematic;

4) stable positive psychological climate. In a family with a favorable psychological climate, each member treats the others withlove , respect and trust, to parents - also with reverence, to the weaker - with readiness to help at any moment. Important indicators of a favorable psychological climate of a family are the desire of its members to spend free time in the home circle, talk about topics that interest everyone, do homework together, and emphasize the virtues and good deeds of everyone. Such a climate promotes harmony, reduces the severity of emerging conflicts, relieves stress, increases the assessment of one’s own social significance and realizes the personal potential of each family member.

The nature of the family atmosphere is determined primarily by how family members communicate with each other. Eat friendly families, in which no one is left on the sidelines, where there are no those who suppress the initiative and activity of others. Parents here respect and support each other - they do not denigrate each other in the eyes of the child or undermine their authority. The family thus turns into a world in which all life is reflected and where all difficulties are overcome with the help of all family members.

Of course, the climate in the family can change. Many things change as children grow older. Just as the weather changes in nature, so does the family atmosphere - one day can be clear and sunny, and another - cloudy, sometimes a thunderstorm can break out. The existence of a certain climate, characteristic of a particular family, is the main thing that largely determines the emotional, social and other types of development of the child.

Bibliography:

1. Winnicott, D.W. Conversation with parents / D.V. Winnicott. - M.: DiK, 2012. – 296 p.
2. Clarina, L.M. Development of a preschooler in kindergarten and at home / L.M. Clarina. – St. Petersburg: Detstvo-Press, 2011. – 183 p.

3. Kulikova T.A. Family pedagogy and home educationhttp://www.pedlib.ru/Books/3/0386/3_0386-23.shtml

4. Sokolov, V.M. Moral development preschooler / V.M. Sokolov. - M.: Sfera, 2005. – 385 p.

Report on district parent meeting

« The psychological climate of the family as an important component in raising a child.”

Tasks:

1. Show the importance of the psychological climate in the family for raising a child.

2. Expand parents’ knowledge about the types of parenting and their impact on the development of the child’s personality.

Plan:

1. The role of the family.

2. Psychological climate in the family.

3. Types of education and their influence on the development of the child.

4. View the presentation “On raising children.”

5. Reflection.

Equipment, materials: laptop, presentation “On raising children”, O.A. Nikolaeva’s blog “Besedochka” for work on types of upbringing, handouts for each “Statements and aphorisms about raising children”.

PERFORMANCE:

The family acts as most important factor personality development. Here a child is born, here he receives initial knowledge about the world and his first life experience.

Probably many will agree with me that it is the family, family education that plays the main role in the development of the child, both preschool and school age. The child must be raised by parents, and all social institutions (kindergartens, schools) can only help them in providing conditions for the child’s self-development, helping him to recognize his individual inclinations, inclinations and realize them in an acceptable form that is useful for himself and society. Family education has a wide temporal range of impact: it continues throughout a person’s life, occurring at any time of the day, at any time of the year.

What a child acquires from the family during childhood, he retains throughout his life. The importance of the family as an educational institution is due to the fact that the child stays in it for a significant part of his life, and in terms of the duration of its impact on the individual, none of the educational institutions can compare with the family. It lays the foundations of the child’s personality, and by the time he enters school, he is already more than half formed as a person.

Family can act as both a positive and negative factor education. The positive impact on the child’s personality is that no one, except the people closest to him in the family - mother, father, grandmother, grandfather, brother, sister, treats the child better, loves him and cares so much about him. And at the same time, no other social institution can potentially cause as much harm in raising children as a family can do.

The family is a special kind of collective that plays a fundamental, long-term and important role in education. It is in the family that the child receives his first life experience and makes his first observations on how to behave in various situations. It is very important that what we teach a child is supported by specific examples, so that he can see that in adults, theory does not diverge from practice.

PSYCHOLOGICAL CLIMATE

The more or less stable emotional mood characteristic of a particular family is called the psychological climate of the family. It is a consequence of family communication, i.e. arises as a result of the mood of all family members, their emotional experiences and worries, their attitude towards each other, towards other people, towards work, towards surrounding events. People spend most of their lives in families; they are connected to each other by the most intimate feelings and relationships. Therefore, the psychological climate is a complex of psychological conditions that promote or hinder family cohesion.

The psychological state and development of the child are influenced by the emotional state of the parents themselves and the relationships between family members. All kinds of quarrels, alcohol abuse, scenes of parents physically harming each other, frequent swearing in front of the child negatively affects his emotional state. And if these cases are constant in the family and the child experiences constant stress due to this, then a neurotic state may arise.

The emotional state of the child, in turn, affects intellectual development child. It is noted that the mental abilities of children and young people growing up in a negative social environment are definitely lower than those growing up in a favorable social environment.

There are 2 types of psychological climate: favorable and unfavorable.
A favorable psychological climate of a family is characterized by the following features: cohesion, the possibility of comprehensive personal development, a sense of security and emotional satisfaction, pride in belonging to one’s family, responsibility, well-developed self-criticism and friendly criticism towards any family member, mutual tolerance and correctness in cases of discrepancy opinions. Here the law of life is the desire and ability to understand another person. An important indicator of the psychological climate of a family is the desire of its members to spend free time in the home circle, talk about topics of interest, and do homework together.
Basically, parents spend most of their time at work, where they have their relationships, moods, and when we come home, we sometimes don’t think that our loved ones, mainly children, suffer from the fact that their parents Bad mood, I do not have anyone to talk to. Sometimes we bring all the negative emotions home, taking it out on our children. An unfavorable psychological climate in the family leads to quarrels, psychological tension, and depression.

What happens to the children? You can often hear from teachers that a child behaves badly in class, interferes with teaching the lesson, etc. But at home he is completely calm and polite. Why? This happens the same way as with parents. At work we try to look carefree, but when we get home we become unbearable: everything annoys us, we don’t want to talk to anyone, i.e. we get rid of all the negative emotions that we have accumulated over the whole day, and the child suffers, i.e. we transfer our problems and concerns onto our child. This happens all the time and turns into a corresponding way of life.
Even from primary school age, we can observe how a child lives in a family, how he feels in it. You don’t have to ask about this, but watch how children play; during the game they transform into their parents, copy their actions (put them in a corner, swear loudly, etc.)

According to statistics, a child is given from 17 to 30 minutes per day. With age, this time decreases.
It educates the child in the entire daily life of the family, the relationships between its members, work, leisure, etc.
“Your own behavior is the most decisive thing,” wrote Anton Semenovich Makarenko. “Do not think that you are raising a child only when you talk to him, or teach him, or order him. You raise him at every moment of your life, even when you are not at home. How you dress, how you talk to other people and about other people, how you are happy or sad, how you communicate with friends or enemies, how you laugh, read the newspaper - all this is of great importance for a child. The child sees or feels the slightest changes in tone, all the turns of your thoughts reach him in invisible ways, you do not notice them. And if at home you are rude, or boastful, or drunk, and even worse, if you insult your mother, you are already causing great harm to your children, you are already raising them badly, and your unworthy behavior will have the most dire consequences.

The true essence of educational work, you yourself have already guessed this, probably lies not in your conversations with the child, not in direct influence on the child, but in the organization of your family, your personal and social life and in the organization of the child’s life. Educational work is, first of all, the work of an organizer. In this case, therefore, there are no trifles.”

It is very important that the family reinforces the skills and habits of behavior that the child develops at school. Unified, coordinated requirements of family and school are one of the conditions for proper education.

TYPES OF FAMILY EDUCATION

(ON BLOG assignment)

10 main mistakes of parents
in raising children

1. Inconsistency. This is a very common mistake. If the baby has caused trouble, the parents scold him and warn him about all sorts of restrictions. But some time passes and the mother, having forgotten that she recently threatened the child to cancel a walk in the park or watch cartoons, as if forgetting about her own promise, takes her to the attractions or turns on a cartoon series.

Consequences: the child grows up willful, he stops taking the words of his parents seriously. It turns out, as in the proverb: “A dog barks, the wind blows.”

2. Inconsistency of demands from adults. A situation often occurs when a family places completely different demands on a child, for example, the mother wants the child to clean up the toys after playing, while the grandmother does the cleaning herself. Often disputes about the correctness of a particular position are conducted right in front of the children, and opposing coalitions are created in the family.

Consequences: A child may grow up to be a conformist, adapting to the opinions of others. It is also possible to show disrespect for the parent whose position the child perceives as unfavorable for himself.

3. Uneven attitude towards the child. It is more common in families consisting of a child and a single mother. The mother either kisses the child while playing with him, or withdraws into herself, not paying attention to her child, or screams and gets angry at him.

Consequences: a hysterical person will grow up who cannot control her behavior. Detachment from the mother is often observed due to the fact that the child does not know what to expect from her.

4. Connivance. The child does what he considers necessary, regardless of the opinions and desires of the people around him. For example, when he comes to visit, he begins to demand that he be given the thing he likes, although it is fragile, and the owners value it, or during Sunday lunch in a cafe, he begins to run around the hall, pestering strangers who have come to rest. The parents of such a child are perplexed: “So what? He's a child!

Consequences: you are guaranteed to grow up to be a complete egoist and insolent person.

5. Spoiled. It manifests itself in the fact that parents constantly follow the child’s lead, fulfilling all his wishes, often at the expense of infringing on their own interests or the interests of other people.

Consequences: This miscalculation in upbringing leads to the child growing up self-centered and callous.

6. Excessive demands, excessive strictness. Exorbitant demands are placed on the child; the most harmless pranks and mistakes are not forgiven.

Consequences : uncertainty about own strength, , often perfectionism, which can become an intolerable burden for a growing person.

7. Affection deficiency. Physical contact is extremely important for a little person, as well as for an adult. Unfortunately, sometimes parents consider it unnecessary to show tender feelings to their child.

Consequences: the child grows up withdrawn and distrustful.

8. Unbridled ambitions of parents. Adults in the family try to realize through the child what they could not achieve themselves, regardless of his interests and desires. For example, they send him to swimming not so that he can develop physically and improve his health, but solely out of the desire to make a champion out of his child.

Consequences: if a child is not attracted to this activity, then, growing up, he will protest in any way. If the activity is to one’s liking, but does not meet the parents’ aspirations, then low self-esteem and dissatisfaction with oneself are formed.

9. Excessive control. A person must have a certain space so that he can make his own choices. Sometimes parents completely ignore the child’s wishes, taking control of any manifestations of life (choosing friends, tracking phone calls etc.)

Consequences: as in the previous case, a protest against unnecessary care in the form of care

10. Role imposition. It is more often observed in families where mothers are single or there is no emotional connection between parents. The mother begins to talk about her failures, discuss other people, imposing problems that the child is not ready to accept.

Consequences: mental stress that is too much for a child can cause pessimism and reluctance to live, and the proper distance between the adult and the child is erased.

Family drawing technique

gives an idea of ​​the child’s subjective assessment of his family, his place in it, and his relationships with other family members.
Based on the analysis of the drawings of the children in the class, several general trends development of intrafamily relationships:
If you want to know how your child feels in the family or how he relates to his relatives, offer him the task: “Draw your family”

If a child draws himself in the center, don’t worry - he draws from the position of his vision. This is his world, in which he is the main sorcerer.

If he only draws himself, he will feel lonely.

Usually, after himself, the child draws someone whom he considers to be the main one in the family. If he drew a pet second, then the child is lonely.

If he didn't draw someone, he might be offended by him.

And if a child draws all his relatives holding hands together, then in your family he is surrounded by the love and attention of loved ones.

If there is little communication in the family, then the child draws mom and dad far from each other, with a barrier.

If someone is depicted without a mouth, without arms or with very long arms, then the baby experiences fear of this person due to the fact that he is shouted at and severely punished.

If someone is drawn with thumbs (like a “scarecrow”), the world seems uncomfortable to the child.

Legs are disproportionately thick - there is a tense atmosphere in the family; very long legs - a desire for independence.

For a loved one, the child will take the same paints with which he painted himself.

A very contrasting image is a sign of an unresolved conflict for the child.

If the child is assertive and active, he will choose warm colors.

Cool colors – the child’s character is characterized by dreaminess and thoughtfulness.

Love of freedom, independence - if, when coloring, the pencil jumps out of the outline.

Neat shading, but if there are unpainted stripes it says
about uncertainty, defenselessness.

TESTING

(presentation)

REMEMBER! (presentation)

USEFUL LITERATURE

Annex 1

Characteristics, manifestations:

parents impose their opinion on the child.

"suppression" of the child

Eternal instructions, reminders, sovereigns

The child satisfies not his own needs, but the needs of his parents, providing them with a more comfortable life.

Possible consequences:

decreased interest in the surrounding world and the formation of lack of initiative;

can lead to the development of personality traits such as timidity and self-doubt, or, conversely, aggressiveness and negativism;

The child becomes “deaf to the parent”, waiting for the usual threats or raising his voice in order to begin to do what he is told.

upon reaching adolescence the child may want to quickly break out of a too rigid system, where his interests are ignored, and gain freedom

growing up, a child can fall under the influence of any other authoritarian system: sects, political parties, criminal companies, in which he will be just as obedient to the governed

As an adult, he will either acquire a very authoritarian character, or become an executor of someone else’s will: passive, dependent and depressed.

Motives of parents' behavior

Against the backdrop of protracted problems with a child, parents sometimes lose faith in his ability to bear responsibility or do anything independently and well.

If the child does not have chronic problems, the parents' motive may be to compensate for those internal feelings that they experienced in childhood when they felt that they were not noticed and not taken seriously. Parents' search for an opportunity to assert themselves and feel their power sometimes ends in using children for these purposes.

Overprotective type

Characteristics, manifestations:

Parents try their best to protect the child from possible dangers (“Don’t climb the stairs, you’ll fall”).

The child is protected from any difficulties, worries, negative emotions and experiences.

There are no requirements or responsibilities for the child.

They are afraid that all sorts of misfortunes will happen to their child.

Possible consequences:

Contributes to the development of lack of independence, difficulty in making decisions, and the inability to find a way to resolve a previously unknown situation;

In critical cases - passivity and avoidance of solving a life problem.

The child will be poorly adapted to adult life.

An infantile-consumer attitude towards the world, the child experiences a delay in the development of skills.

Painful reaction to any demands and restrictions.

It will be difficult, and sometimes impossible, to cope with your feelings: grief, anger, resentment, which will later arise in real life.

Difficulties in communicating with peers when you have to independently defend your interests and solve problems that arise.

The child denies the justification of parental fears. He looks for opportunities to take risks and can be incredibly careless.

Motives of parents' behavior

This parenting style usually reflects the parents' emotional problems stemming from their childhood, when they may have felt unwanted. The motive in this case is obvious: to feel knowledgeable and competent, important and needed, while caring for a chronically helpless child.

Hypoprotective (permissive) type

Characteristics, manifestations:

Parents have little interest in the child; he is left to his own devices.

The child experiences a lack of attention, care, warmth

It can be observed both in families with low incomes, where parents are forced to work a lot, and in financially prosperous families, where parents are busy with their lives, dress and feed the baby well, buy toys, but have practically no contact with him.

Possible consequences:

The lack of rules and requirements leads to the fact that the child does not have solid support or a sense of security;

The child has a feeling of uselessness, that he is not loved

Motives of parents' behavior

This is how parents can behave:

Who, throughout their own childhood, felt ignored, rejected, unaccepted and not cared for enough;

Democratic type

Characteristics, manifestations:

Parents are considered the most important They have the main share of power and responsibility, but when deciding important issues, the interests of children's opinions are taken into account.

The child knows well his limitations, responsibilities, and area of ​​responsibility.

The parent participates in the child's growing up.

Possible consequences:

The child is aware of his own needs and understands the desires of others

The child gains emotional stability and self-confidence

Independence, responsibility, ability to cope with many age-appropriate life difficulties.

Appendix 2. Sayings and aphorisms about raising children

The best school of discipline is the family (Smiles S.)

Main meaning and purpose family life- parenting. The main school of raising children is the relationship between husband and wife, father and mother. (Sukhomlinsky V. A.)

Do you know what the surest way to make your child unhappy is to teach him not to refuse anything. (J. J. Rousseau)

Many troubles have their roots precisely in the fact that from childhood a person is not taught to manage his desires, he is not taught to correctly relate to the concepts of possible, necessary, and impossible. (Sukhomlinsky V. A.)

Nothing acts in the young souls of children more powerfully than the universal power of example, and yet all other examples of no one else impress them more deeply and firmly than the example of their parents. (Novikov N.I.)

The guilt and merit of children falls to a huge extent on the heads and consciences of their parents. (Dzerzhinsky F. E.)

Our children are our old age. Proper upbringing is our happy old age, bad upbringing is our future grief, these are our tears, this is our guilt before other people, before the whole country. (Makarenko A.S.).

Parents often confuse the concepts of “upbringing” and “education” and think that they have given their child an upbringing when they have forced him to study so many subjects. Hence the frequent disappointment of parents in their children in subsequent years. (Rubinstein A. G.)

A family is a separate unit of society in which all family members lead a common life, build relationships, share experiences, and develop morally and spiritually. First of all, spiritual and emotional stability, as well as the mood with which a person is in society, depends on the psychological climate in the family.

Psychologists note that the moral and psychological climate in a family is made up of those mutual feelings experienced by members of the household. The psychological climate affects the mood of family members, the acceptance and implementation of common ideas, and the achievement of results.

Social and psychological climate in the family

Let's look at an example of how the socio-psychological climate in a family affects the health of family relationships. It is an indisputable fact that family plays a paramount role in a person’s life. When entering into marriage, creating a new link in society, partners experience internal development and a transition to a new stage in life. Now the spouses together create the “weather in the house,” which will later show how truly, by listening and understanding each other, they weaved the outline of family values.

With the birth of a baby, all the love, care and tenderness is directed towards the new family member; from the first minutes, the qualities that are inherent in this particular family circle begin to be laid down and formed in the newborn. Researchers of family relationships emphasize that over the years, feelings of responsibility, support, compassion and respect increase between husband and wife, hence the stability of relationships and devotion to each other.

The psychological climate in a family is favorable only when everyone in the family circle treats each other with love, respect and trust. Children revere the old, the elderly share their experiences with the younger, in general, everyone strives to help each other in any situation. An indicator of a favorable climate in a family is spending free time together, doing common things, doing household chores together and much more that unites all family members.

Let's summarize, in order for the moral and psychological climate in the family to be favorable, for household members to feel loved and happy, for relationships between spouses and family members to develop in a favorable direction, you must, first of all, be honest and sincere with yourself and your family, love them and respect them .